Sunday, January 25, 2009

Ben Jammin and the Whalers

[This is an old one]
I ate whale meat today! I was at an "izzakayia". Which is like a "gastropub" in the UK. Which, for us Americans, means beer and food at the same time. What a concept! The drinking situation is confusing here. They don't have standing bars, only sitting down at table type ones. Which is an entirely different establishment than a "Restaurant". These are incredibly small. Usually seat 5-10 people. You're expected to order and eat food with your drinks. As opposed to back at home, where you avoid the bar food at all costs. So on a given night, you go out for food and beer and after that you go to a smaller place for beer and food.
Anyways, here's how it went down.

Me: Hmm.. french fries, rice cakes, miso, chicken and "#$*!@"..... what the heck is "#$*!@"
My friend Mark: Oh.. that's whales meat. Japan is like the only country who still whales.
Me: I beg to differ... the US can still wail pretty hard! (Over here I'm a dumb joke factory, I don't know why this is).
Mark: .....
Me: Yeah I'd read about that a while back. But who the heck would wan't to eat whale meat?

(seconds later)

Me: One whale meat, please.


I guess I had to see what the fuss was all about. Also, I felt it my civic duty to stick it to the peace corps. In your face PEAS CORPSE! (Actually I'm neutral to against on this issue, but I always thought it best to taste both sides of the argument. And the pro-side has a good point on the grounds of flavoriciousness). So it was pretty damn good. Not better than say a rare steak, but a nice meaty fishy taste which is really a lot closer to rabbit and other such bloody, gamey type meats. So, I feel a little guilty.. but full. I hope god's not a whale.

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Alright already, Ben. Enough is enough! Get yer fingers amovin'.

I blame this lapse in updates on my lack of excitement here... and society... and the parents. Yeah, the parents are always to blame... The society of unexciting parents!(whomever they may be) That's why I can't keep this gall-darn thing going. Sorry all, but there has been just nothing new to report. Holy heck, I haven't even called home since I got back here! This may have to be a blog on the difficulty of writing blogs, which just so happens to be set in a Japanesque land.

Which reminds me, my band of thieves has hereby renamed the county from whence this travelog originates as Japants. Similarly, the inhabitants of said country are the Japanties. Childish; yes, but not without a certain subtle hilarity. Case in point; here is what happens when you google "Japanties"... yep.. that pretty much sums up how I understand my surroundings on any given day. Well, not the English room. That is my space. There, I can post articles about Obama, explain to the kids who Shakespeare is or even teach them how to explode a knuckle bump. Yes, I taught them that! (the 10 minute passing period is too long).


But back to the confusion stuff. At lunch time today, I noticed there was a crazyness in the air. A certain panic and calling of many parents on phones. These words I can understand. "Mother", "Father", "Student," "Influenza", "sensei restbreak" (sick day) and so on. By the time I got to my last class of the day, 20 students are missing. 20 STUDENTS! Out of 42. Thats only the 7th graders! There are 6th and 8th graders too...maybe? Everyone is gone. And this all happened today. I've never seen anything like this. Oh wait.. I have!


So the next update may be from the hospital or beyond the grave. Please send strong drugs, plenty of cough syrup (my brand is "grandpa's old") and notify Dustin hoffman immediately.


Actually, I am feeling pretty good. For once, I'm the healthy one. When I first arrived, I brought with me a doozy of a pandemic that Whitney and I had been cooking up together. Alas, it really only affected the other teachers, which meant more work for me and students skipping other classes to crash and disrupt mine. I had a feeling this landed me firmly in the realm of "diseased foreigner". That, coupled with my strange eating habits (today's lunch: hardboiled egg, raw carrot and chocolate), general scruff-mugged disheveliness (compared to the clean-shaven, gel-haired, suited and booted salarymen look of my peers) and the fact that I refuse to wear the "asian face mask" thingy, cast a bit of doubt on the trustworthiness of my health. Which has been admittedly dubious at times. At least my continuing health now proves that eating garbage and drinking the sewagey tap water only builds an indellible immune system!