Dropping Bombs and Obamas

So, all the kids want to know who I voted for. Naturally, I would tell them that voting is for squares and that I never vote. Haha, just kidding. But, seing as how they don't know words like 'square' or 'chump' or 'sucker', I tell them that it's personal information. I do tell them that I am suprised, however, at the results. Historically I am grossly incorrect in my predictions of the elections, this time was no different. The children are all excited about Obama. This was also a suprise to me. I remember not giving a flying Fuji about politics when I was thier age. Likewise, I don't know who thier prime minister is... I do remember Abe whatshisface, but that was a year or so ago. I could pick the Emperor out of a lineup but can't remember his name right now. Anyway the day is full of suprises.

Which brings us to point number 2 of the day. Eastern toilets, like the chopstick, are old fashioned and difficult to use. Similarly, I am dealthy afraid of dropping material onto my clothes when I use them, if you know what I mean. If at all possible, it is advisable for one to use the facilities at home. However occasionally, you have to do your business at school. For those who don't know, the Eastern toilet is essentially a hole in the ground that flushes. Nothing to sit on nothing to grab a hold of. Using your imagination, you can understand why I am paranoid about having dirty pantlegs.

Today I was faced with such a challenge. It seemingly went off without a hitch, but you can never tell. I felt confident in my appearance untill class, 30 minutes later, wherein a student began to laugh and point wildly at my my lower leg region. Normally, I can't be embarrased by my students (I will tell you the detials of this necessary emotional fortitude another time), but, had I entered a classroom sporting a fecal decal, I don't know what I'd do to save face.

The other teacher soon translated what the children were saying just as I was beginning to pour sweat. Turns out, my socks have holes in them (remember no shoes indoors). I turned this into part of today's lesson, "Does and Doesn't". Please fill in the blank.

Does Ben need new socks? Yes he _____.

[ Does Ben have poopy pants? No he doesn't. Thank god!]

Osakaben

Well, it has been a week and a half since I have been able to find the time to write. Every journal is always the same. First few pages are full, followed by 100 blanks. This time will be different, or so I will tell myself yet again.
First things first. Teaching during my first week. For those who don’t know, I am teaching Junior High School (ages 12-14). I do team teaching, which means that there is always a Japanese teacher present to explain things in Japanese and to maintain the order of the class. Or so I would think. Here’s the thing that I did not expect. Discipline here is way different. The idea is that the teachers are much more involved in the student’s lives than the teachers at home. You might say that the teachers will know as much about the student’s lives as the parents do. So, when a few of the not so well behaved students get noisy or lose interest in the lesson, the teacher will often ignore them until they stop. This results in what I like to call the ‘floating student syndrome.’ More often than not, it is quite hilarious and difficult to hide my smiles and laughter. For example. My first class on my first day, a student simply gets up out of his seat without uttering a single word, walks across the room and performs a bongo solo on another student’s head. I thought it was pretty damn funny… the class clowns at home got nothing on these guys. Hat’s off to you gentlemen! I waited for the Teacher to discipline the student, but it never happened. So I thought, maybe this is how it always is.
The next class, the students were perfectly behaved. A teachers dream.. just like in the States. Upon viewing this class, I realized that it’s not against the rules to misbehave it is merely decriminalized. I heard somewhere that it is illegal to kick the kids out of class like we do in the US when students misbehave. No sending to the principals office here (admittedly hearsay though).
Also the students ask me funny personal questions that are hilariously phrased. Two of my favorites so far are: “Are you a condom fan?” and one student wrote me a note “Do you raiku Bem?” I didn’t no how to answer either question. I answered “No” to both meaning that “No, that’s not an appropriate/real question.” Both times resulted in an uproar of laughter anyway. I guess they outsmarted me.
After that, my classes have been going off with few unexpected hitches. I think I7ve put myself to sleep with some of the lessons I’ve been required to give, but some classes have a karma disciplinary plan in action. If you fall asleep, you run the risk of waking up with pen all over your face (Hey, just like drinking with your friends!!) or getting pelted with erasers from other students. (Hey, just like drinking with the crazy guy under the bridge!!) So it’s all nice and familiar.
Today is Halloween. I’ve given my Halloween lessons all week, which included this rare gem from 1987 (courtesy of Duane “Headbanger” Morse. Center 2nd row.) As I write this, I am dressed as Luigi from the Mario Brothers video game and am at school. The kids love it, but I keep getting my hat stolen from me (Rather fitting actually, as this happens quite often in the Mario Brothers video game [Nintendo64 platform])
The classes went great today, the students were genuinely interested [in my costume] and participated much more than usual. Also, the peanut butter cups were a hit in the teachers lounge. Can you imagine a country without Reese’s? Although in Japan’s defense, the Ritz crackers here destroy the ones we have at home. I think they are deep fried in a vat of butter and nicotine because they turn you into a junkie instantly.
Today I played soccer with the kids at lunch. It was a bit difficult to run and kick in overalls and boots, but I did manage to work up quite a sweat just in time for a teacher to come get me and tell me I was late for my next class. The students ignore the bells when a good game gets going…. My kinda kids!!! So my last class enjoyed a sopping wet lesson on does and doesn’t from a stinky and partially dressed farmer looking guy. (Hey, just like drinking out in the woods!!) Ok this one counts for 2 entries. Thanks for tuning in. Next week we’ll have the musical comedy of the smothers brothers and special guest Carnac the Magnificent APPLAUSE

Pictures soon to follow.